Meeting the family

We had some mighty fine people call in and pick us up yesterday. Man are they tall. That young fella is taller than his dad, and as for the mistress, well she's just short. Looks like she forgot to grow. The girlfriend was a delightful young lady and got the mistress seal of approval. She's a bit short too but so in love!!

Oh no, more of those embraces she likes. The mistress says spread the love and for me to get used to it. Oh, it's a tough life being a gnome.......

So that son of hers took us out for lunch. A mighty fine place on that waterfront. Beautiful under that large hat over the top of us.

She even shared her chips with me, but not the wine. 

The announcement was made that she wasn't driving and wouldn't share it and I had to have the water. She said the wine would go to my head out here in the fresh air. I'm to stick with the water again. What's she talking about. Oh, it's a tough life, cos she thinks she knows everything. Hmmm

We walked around the waterfront admiring the boats. That mistress is eyeing up a small cruise boat around the harbor. Maybe she will take me to meet the captain, cos I would quite like to learn how that boat works. I really liked that big boat she took me on, and this little one is just my size.

I was plonked down to meet these strange animals sitting in the blazing sun. They didn't have much to say though.

I would have been quite at home if she left me here. Those creatures around me would leave me to read my book and maybe some of the holiday makers could say hello or smile at me. 

Later on, the way back they got these huge ice-creams. But she wouldn't share that either. I was told what passes the lips stays on the hips! 

Looks like she has had more than one or two!!

The mistress is feeling very happy about meeting some friends on Facebook/messenger that she used to work with. Says it's been so long since they caught up and are surprised that we are away from home for 5 months.

She tells me we only have a few more days here before we move to the next house, in a different suburb, near here. So, she's started to pack up a few things.  

Me thinks she will miss that cute cat, who sleeps on her bed and that large black dog that gets all the love here.

Oh, it's a tough life being a gnome!

Santa has been and Gone

Just look at my loot. My favorite chocolate fish. What on earth are those god dam frogs doing in my stocking. The old mistress tells me that I can put then in the Gnome swimming pool when we get home.

Who is that fella sitting beside me? Looks like he means business.

He is even looking over my shoulder to see what I am reading. I'm checking him out cos he might be underage, and we can't have that.

She rose early yesterday, Christmas day, such a carry on really. She said the dog had to be walked before we went out for breakfast. What, it's not 6am yet and she was out the door. Oh well I had some more sleep before they roared back. 

Such a commotion, things flying into the chilly bins. Got to have the bubbly she said. But she was driving. Oh, my goodness she better be careful you know. She doesn't want to crash that super-fast sports car, cos it will wreck the paintwork, and her pride!! Hehehe

She said I should know that she was a careful driver, and if the blue lights roar into action, then she would really put her foot down😏.

Now just listen to this. That cat and dog here they got presents too from Santa. The dog was very happy outside with his. 

The cat wasn't so sure about this carry on. She played until losing interest.

So off out we went for more parcels and breakfast, BBQ bacon and egg croissant at her daughters. The granddaughter assisted me to open my stocking then her cat got his own parcel.... what another animal for Santa, gosh he was busy with all these people, animals and gnomes. But you just look at this picture.

This cat called horse, cos she swallowed one......is playing with a fish that's jumping around the place. She sits on it and that poor fish (not a real one) she chews it and tosses it around. 

I don't know about these humans. I am sure there is something strange about them. Oh well it is giving me some entertainment I suppose.

So, the mistress was tired last night, and I spotted her getting into the wine. She announced that she wasn't driving and to mind my own business. 

The Sneeze

Well, I was quietly sitting under the Christmas tree, with me stocking, patiently waiting for Santa, and the dog was outside, and the cat, goodness only knows, when all the sudden the mistress had an almighty sneeze. I shook in me boots with fright when the dog, Toff came flying inside to check her out. She was very concerned about that woman here. I don't think that Toff had heard such an almighty sneeze before, when all the sudden another sneeze came. Toff had a very worried look on her face and made sure the mistress recovered. What on earth could a dog do anyway! 

Dogs know how to go on walks, laze around here and eat. Otherwise, she's useless. The mistress wasn't happy with my point of view, but tough, we are all allowed an opinion. She says Toff gives her more love than me and oh what nonsense. "Love" how ridiculous.

Gosh humans are such crazy people who don't know what they're talking about. I'll just read my book and hope for some peace and no more sneezes, because I don't want to see the dog have concerns for that god dam woman again.

So, when is that Santa fella supposed to come here anyway. I hope he knows I'm on holiday and a long way from home. This waiting is driving me to drink. I could do with a beer. I wonder if I click my fingers or rock hard in my chair to attract her attention that a nice cool one would appear. Hmmmm might be waiting a while, I think. 

Good golly gosh, I put my radar on for a beer to come to me, and look, she's not a bad old chick sometimes. I had to pour it myself because she was on holiday, but she did give me 2 cherries and a strawberry. Shes said I had to be grateful....oh I will be when Santa arrives Mistress!! 

I need to show you proof

Can you see my stocking?

This is LOVE she says

 

More love she says...how ridiculous!!

Now I know where she went this morning

Her daughter and granddaughter have a cat too. More Love she says!

But wait, I asked what name she has given it.." Horse" what, that's a cat, us Gnomes do know the difference between horses and cats. 

Just look at that cat and how she's slipping off her knee, and just look at the size of it. Maybe she ate a horse! Oh, dear I need a beer to get over this one me thinks. Cheers

I've laid a complaint 

It's just not fair, the cat, dog and that girl who visits get far more attention than me around here. I caught the mistress giving that cat a cuddle this morning. I could hear the cat, Daisy purring from my position under the Christmas tree. It's not on, this business. The dog too, Toffs her name she has lengthy discussions with the mistress and Toff takes her for a walk and she comes back very red in the face from all these hills she makes her climb, and this house is so high up we are living in the clouds some days. Hehehe its funny to see her all flustered and Toff just lies down and has a sleep.

Maybe the mistress should do this too. She was a bit off this afternoon and had her daughter running after her with cups of tea and ordered her to stay resting on the couch. Gosh she sure knows how to give orders. I know where she gets this from.... chip off the old block I think !! She had to do as she was told and had no choice in the matter. Gosh I will have to be careful, or someone may start to give me orders. Us Gnomes don't take orders. We just do as we jolly well, please.

I had to stay home again today and keep my eye on these animals who live here. I'm not going to tell you what they get up to when the mistress takes off in that jolly red car of hers. Thats Gnome business only. Not fit for humans.

I told her she needs to clean that car again cos its dirty and she told me where to go!! She said she cleaned it a few days ago but didn't say which bit 😉😉  

She said if I moan about it then I have to clean it. I'm sure Father Christmas doesn't like dirty cars either. Hey, her car is the same color as his clothes. Fancy that. I have a red hat too, and black boots. I wonder if Father Christmas will come to me. I told her I've been good. I think I should hang up a stocking and see what happens.

I won't tell her about this, and we will see. I wonder where I could find a stocking to hang up. Maybe I will go through her suitcase and fine one when she's out.

The granddaughter took a photo of the mistress in the mall today. Gosh I wish I was there; I rather like posing for photos. I shouldn't complain really cos she did take me out Saturday night for a beer and Sunday lunch she had me on the water you know. 

Number 19, what's this about? Hmm Maybe I drank 19 waters.

 🎅🎄🎈

 She bought me a beer

The mistress isn't a bad old chick you know. So very kind of her to shout for me. We went to a Thai restaurant tonight. The lovely assistant thought I wasn't a bad looking dude either. She asked lots of questions, then brought her out a meal.

You know what? I really looked the part sitting here with my beer until she took a swig and almost emptied the glass. I thought she was on the water. Oh, it's a tough life being a Gnome.

I must tell you a story, you see while the mistress was sleeping, that cat around here gets up to all sorts of mischief. I heard all sorts of activity down the passage. Hehehe  was so funny to listen to.

When the mistress got up, she went down to see what was on the floor, yukky remains of a lizard and the mat not where it was supposed to be. She let out a roar, and I heard a small word........

She couldn't find the cat to tell her off at these constant surprises, cos the other morning it was feathers!!

Good on the cat for being missing as she would have had a real talking to me thinks. Daisy did turn up for breakfast as it seems she's always hungry. She paraded around here very pleased with herself. 

Its nearly Christmas

The mistress took us over to her daughters yesterday and needed help to unravel the branches on the Christmas tree ready for her Granddaughter Camile to decorate when she came home from school.

But first we needed in on the action and supervise what goes where. I got engrossed in my book and me mates just stood there not having seen such a carry on. All they could do was smile at Camile and were super quiet until it was time to go home again.

She did quite a good job really and would finish another day and her dad would put the lights on later.

Toff the black Labrador needed to go outside, and we couldn't be too long. He seems to enjoy his walks, but they got wet yesterday, and had to get completely changed on return. That dog you know he just stands and shakes and he's dry. What strange site to see. Another first for me to learn.

Why doesn't the mistress try this method, would be much easier I would say. BUT PLEASE not in front of me😅

I'm learning so many strange things on this journey. The old mistress has completely wound right down and in real holiday mode. I'm always in this state cos that's what us gnomes do...holiday mode.

Something else was so funny to watch last night ...the cat sat on the mistress.... what, heaven help me. .

Is she licking herself or the mistress. Seemed very comfortable and went to sleep.

I can't get any peace today cos its pouring down and she can't take Toff for a walk. Shes waiting for a break in the weather. Gee that might never happen. Oh well I will just use selective hearing mode and read my book. I'm onto another now and it's a funny one too, and I don't share such information with anyone cos its 
Gnome business.

OMG she's always looking and admiring these trees. Pohutukawa me thinks. They are everywhere all shapes and sizes. It's just a tree for goodness' sake. It's a wonder she didn't put me under it cos I was hot and needed shade. Ahh well another day. She said if I didn't watch out, she would place me on a branch. Now that could be real fun for a gnome.

I must say this is a great photo of her!
 

Tauranga

House sitting

The mistress is very pleased with herself. Shes navigated us around cursed the road works at times but, managed to park the car in a car park building and find it again after finishing in the city. I did see her write the floor number down though, but don't tell her. 😂

Our house family are lovely people, and the 7-year-old enjoyed the gnome stories and even sat their gnome beside me. Me new mate had a nasty injury to his foot area but am sure they will sort it out. It's quite nice having a new mate while we're here.

They even have this huge 4-legged friend, called Toff and a little fur baby called Daisy. We don't see her much as she prefers her own company or catching the local prey, a little bird who never stood a chance.

Us Gnomes wouldn't dare do such a thing. Fancy trying to get through those feathers to the meat. YUKKY.

So, the mistress's family seem to be very happy to see us. She, said to me that she had never driven to her kid's homes before. I guess she was pretty chuffed with herself. I am too. BUT don't you dare tell her this!

She goes off with Toff on a lead and comes back pooped from all the hills around here. They say we are up in the clouds up here. Gosh this is new stuff for a Gnome to get his head around. I've never lived in the clouds before. You just wait till we get home and I tell all me mates. They will never believe me. Maybe they will be jealous, Hmm I better be careful how much I share. 

I've just heard her moan that she can't get a photo on here again. Hmm

Tinker`-Winkle- Tinkerbelle

 

Yours truly

We're not bad poses are we.

Had a lovely time tonight with the owners

they invited me up for drinks.

Great people

I recommend this place

Its 6 stars out of 6  

 

 

Her favourite place

Qued up to go on boat

A quieter day

Well, the mistress didn't surface too early today. I guess she needed a sleep in as I did too. I couldn't focus on my book as its hard work watching her drive you know. I do have to make sure she obeys the road rules and stays awake on the job. Some of the potholes she drove over had me leaping out my chair several times, and this isn't good for a gnomes b....I don't have much flesh in that area, so I feel very bruised, but I don't dare show her. Thats just Gnome business. These new friends she brought me don't have much clothing on and my eyes hurt from their color scheme. They didn't get to experience these potholes but by the look of the road works going on here I'm sure she will land in some again. 😉

So today I cruised, while the mistress went out with the daughter. Gee it was so peaceful with her gone. I had a nosey at the lovely garden where we are staying. They did a mighty fine job around here and a lovely peaceful place to stay. I heard the mistress say, "gosh another posh place to stay".

Things are not good if we have an unhappy mistress. Life just isn't fun if she's in a mood. 

 

 Gisborne

A long day yesterday,4th Dec for the mistress. The road condition wasn't flash. She announced that the road signs were a joke. She muttered that doing as the sign said was so dangerous. 100k in what should have been 50k was ample. She spoke about the South Island wouldn't dare do this. I just keep quiet and MMOB and read my book. She was so tired that getting onto the internet was a mission and gave up last night.

We had to move motels as couldn't get a second night. Man, you want to see this posh pad. It's a home where they have altered it to accommodate the visitors. A very grand job. Well done, Nic. Accommodation is hard to get here Nic says. No wonder he's building on. 

5th Dec. She just took it quietly today, mooched around a couple of shops, then took me to the gardens. Gosh I'm so lucky you know. I saw all sorts of beautiful cacti flowering and some unusual flowers and I was perched on the ground in my happy place until she disturbed the peace and moved me to another patch, then another.....

I did enjoy the sunshine and fresh air though, but don't tell her will you.

I did hear her muttering that going the coast road to Tauranga was several hours long and would rather go to Opotiki from here. She liked that place once before when she visited it with her mother and wanted to go back again. A little birdie told me that strawberries grow well over there somewhere. mmm....I wonder what this means.

Well after the gardens she stumbled across a Mitre10, oh dear, she said I had to stay in the car cos she might bring back a surprise for me.  Aye what could this be?

OMG she was away ages. I was sleeping on her return and got a huge fright when she disturbed my dreams.

She plonked two new friends beside me, and said to start thinking about names for them, 1 fella and 1 girly girl.  They are both in their swim wear, oh heck you won't see me in swim wear, as I would get my hair wet and water in my ears and eyes. I'd rather have dirt on me, I really would you know. I hate being clean.

The mistress tried cleaning my teeth this morning again and I told her to p.... off. How dare she. A bit of dirt in my mouth is good for me. It's the vitamins I need these days. My aging body needs all the dirt I can get to keep me healthy. I've got a good mind when she's not around I will destroy the toothbrush. I'll fix her I will, you just watch me. That soap stuff is disgusting too. Mmmm think I'll get rid of it too.

Napier

 Well, we have arrived, and the old girl is a bit tired with the driving, plus her aging years mean she's a bit slow at understanding this internet business, hence our delay in doing the blog. Me, I just sit back in my chair and take it all in. I think she's done a jolly good job getting us this far. She tosses me a cherry from time to time and that goes down really well. The mistress is very fond of cherries, and especially as they come all the way from Blenheim.

She rations them out you know.....tis not fair I say. She announced we can't have too many stops on the way cos time flies, and so does her car🏎......😂

Kaikoura was a nice place. She says it's changed a lot with huge hotels going up everywhere. I noted she looked in the shops, but I didn't see her with any extra bags.

So many road works going on and really slowed us down. I think I heard her say a naughty word too.

Next day off to Blenheim to have a cuppa with her cuzzie, and a photo shoot with yours truly in her Vineyard, then on to the nephew for a yummy sandwich, picked up the cherries then she put her food down and we flew into Picton and found our accommodation. Boy oh boy the mistress was far from happy. I haven't seen her this cross for ages. I needed a peg for my nose, but she didn't have one. 

The place stunk. Was clean but run down, no hot running water in kitchen, just cold tap. Windows down 1 side shocking but the ranch slider was good as i needed to keep an eye on that car for her, but oh no we thought an earthquake was happening, but then saw the problem. A huge freight train with its breaks on a way up high on huge supports crossed the area. So, guess who didn't sleep much with 3 going thru all night.! She was very pleased to get on the road the next day and away from the smell.

Dinner at her fav place, the Irish bar and of course with me to pose for more photos. I'm trying to find a container for tips, but the mistress says "Don't be stupid"

Next day she took me to her fav places we saw a few weeks ago but it wasn't such a nice day. Anyway, she was happy and that's the main thing. We can't have an unhappy mistress cos I will wear it!

We drove over the hill on Queen Charlot Drive to check out the cruise ship, and the talent. Do you know she talked to this lovely man for ages. He offered to do a photo shoot of us. I didn't mind as he was a nice chap, and she gave him our card to follow our journey.

I don't mind admitting but they are great photos of me and her!

I'm allowed to skite!

Next, we queued up to get on the Boat. Gee I hadn't been on such a thing. But it was exciting to experience all these new things to see and do. The mistress handled it well I thought. So, we got seated admired the views, did some people watching for a while and after a cuppa she announced that we were going to meet the Captain........WHAT, she got special permission for us to see how it all works and introduced me to a fella who wasn't as busy as the captain, she forgot his name though. Another photo shoot, gosh I could get used to all this attention. They were a nice bunch, and a lovely lady did a video of us for their records. She let me sit in the captain's seat too.  Then on returning to our lounge the girls at the desk wanted proof that we saw the captain's mate. Another photo shoot. Gosh I am a lucky fella doing all these great activities and me mates at home are missing out. 😁

I hope they are keeping an eye on her house. They were told not to have wild parties and upset the neighbors. Cause they would cause a stir in the village. 

Getting off the boat was a bit stressful for the old duck, but she did a good job at getting us to the next motel for the night. Easy peesy with the GPS when she puts the right info in, cos I heard another word when she wasn't amused.

Then today we travelled again to Napier with some rest stops and an interesting place for a cuppa. The staff took me out the back to show me off to the rest of the staff. Another photo shoot. This is a bit like her modeling. Maybe I should be charging a fee for these photos.

Tonight's motel is another good one. Even has a restaurant here so again we head off and she needed a wine for some courage to be in such a place by herself. But she wasn't as I was with her. I nearly had to hold her hand! For goodness' sake she's a grown woman, more photos and staff thought I was great, or was that her!!!!!. 2 wines later and a beautiful meal, she staggered back to our motel.

So, another swear word I could hear cos she couldn't get the photos onto this blog today. It's all that wine, it's gone to her head I feel. So, watch this space cos she may have to get her daughter to sort her out AGAIN.